Almost twenty years ago, an insurance company asked me to do a lunch and learn for their employees who were family caregivers. It started with one of the department heads who told a story that went this this; “my siblings don’t want to help. I moved in with my parents so I can help care for my dad who suffers from Parkinson’s. I work here full time and then I go home and work as the family caregiver until it is time to come back here. I don’t have time to do anything and may not be able to keep my job because I can’t keep up with the stress at home and at work. I am dedicated to caring for my dad and keeping him out of the nursing home, but I am losing it”. A very large percentage of today’s work force is involved in family caregiving and can relate to this story. Over the last two decades, an industry has been created for work life balance and many organizations have an have entire department but today, people feel more stressed and overwhelmed and work life balance seems like only a FANTASY.
The good news is that work life balance is achievable.
There are two reasons why work life balance seems to be only a fantasy.
#1. It is poorly defined: Work life balance eludes most people because they expect it to be a level of attainment. Work life balance is NOT a level of attainment. It is a process and a dynamic relationship between achievement, fulfillment and the factors that influence our choices and decisions in the areas of achievement and fulfillment. Achievement is primarily about “doing,” such as getting things done and meeting goals and obligations. Fulfilment is about “being,” such as feeling satisfied about your relationships and contributions.
#2. It is poorly measured: It needs the 3-pronged approach of awareness, values and choices. The trick is to look beyond what you want to achieve and how you want to feel. It works well when you look at the factors that influence the choices you make to achieve that everchanging balance. It could look like this; first, you gain an awareness of what is causing your work life imbalance, then you look at your personal values, and then you select choices that will minimize your stressors and maximize your fulfillment.
In the next 5 articles, I will discuss the five-step process to move from “STRESSED & OVERWHELMED” to focus and clarity, so that time, productivity and work-life balance can be reclaimed. For more information about my workshops and elder care work place programs, visit www.ElderCareAndCaregivingNetwork.com or email to Stella@StellaNsong.com.
